Monday, November 26, 2012

"Dancing" With the Good Ol' Boys

I am in a mood.

Something happened today and it has set me off. I am not going to go into the details or explain what happened because that's not important. What is important is that I am in a mood and that is what you need to know before you continue to read.

Earlier today I posted the following status: The one constant in Baptist life: You have to fight get anything past the "good ol' boy" network and if they do not want you involved, you will not get to be involved, no matter how passionate or excited you are. It is one the big reasons people my age are leaving Baptist life.

During my lifetime I have been told that I am the future, my generation was the future and we needed to take a more invested interest in whatever our passions were. I have heard older folks often say, "We need the younger people to step up and do this or do that." In fact I am a part of a cohort in the CBF whose purpose is to create healthy future leaders of the church and CBF. I have heard those things and what I have experience is this: If you want to invoke change in a system or you really want to have an active role in that future, you have to fight for it because those older folks, no matter how much they want you to "step up" will not let go.

Not everyone is like this and that needs to be made very clear. Just because someone is of a certain age does not mean anything. However, the truth that I have experienced is that when people gain control and power of any kind they will not relinquish it. You have to wrestle it away from them and you can get a few bruises.

I do not like to use that type of language. I think it furthers an "us vs them" mentality but breaking into a closed group like the "good ol' boys" network is a fight. You have to break through the glass ceiling and once you get in, you have to work at staying in. It's very much like the episode of Friends when Rachel takes up smoking just so she can stay involved in the decisions being made at her work. The difference is that those who fight their way in rarely allow room for others who come after them.

We have a strong tendency to get ourselves in position of power only for ourselves. We look to "meet up" with people who are going to advance our agenda or our place in the "pecking order". Those with the name or the money are the ones who get the "honorary doctorates" just so they will name a seminary, school, university, or church beneficiary to their wealth. That is how institutions do business, the problem is that they end up ignoring the wonderful stories of others who cannot afford to have them told.

During seminary several of us experienced exclusion of our stories and ministries because we did not work at either Richmond's First Baptist or Tabernacle Baptist or Second Baptist. Those were the places, ministers, and students who received the attention because they were in the "it" club. This is not a knock on the pastors there (all very good men and men I actually like being around) and it is not sour grapes, it is the truth. If you are not a part of the "it" group or do not have the right connections then you are going to have to work harder to invoke change than those with the right connections.

The "good ol' boys" network is a corrupt system designed to keep us in control and in power just so we can feel important or feel like we matter. It is designed to designate which people really matter and whom we should not upset because if we do, we risk losing their money. It is wrong. Giving honorary doctorates to people who have nothing to do with the school they are receiving them from just so the school can remain in their good graces is wrong.

I know this comes off as sour grapes but it is not; it is simply an acknowledgment of how we each buy into this corrupt system and if the system is going to change then that change cannot happen from our couches or leaving to start our system because eventually that system will become just like the system we left. If we want to change the system we need to start with ourselves and in our circles. If our own circles are closed instead of expanding, our system will be the same.

As I said, I'm in a mood.

No comments:

Post a Comment