We Don't Say "Hate"

I only had two strict rules when I was a youth minister: 1) Edify 2) We don't say "hate".

You can ask any number of my former youth and they will tell you that I was a stickler when it came to those two rules. My hope was for the youth group and myself to become builders and not destroyers of others. I strongly believe that if a group of teenagers are constantly being taught and shown why we lift one another up and not tear down, strangers who visit will find a safe place where they are encouraged and loved for who they are. Something I think every teenager truly wishes to feel. Of course it didn't always work. I mean they're teenagers and we're adults, we're people and we sometimes use words that tear others down even if we do not mean too so we all are in need of a gentle correction from time to time.

I do not like the word "hate" because it is an extreme. It is the extreme opposite of love. I think it's okay to not be a fan of something (I'm not a fan of Carytown) or not like something (I don't like fried okra) but to use the word hate means you have removed all hope of love. Though I may not be a fan of Carytown, VA and think it's overrated, it does not mean that given time I will never eventually come to see it for the unique place it is. Likewise just because I do not like fried okra, it does not mean that given time I will never eventually try it, even if it made me throw up when I was four.

That's why I try very hard to never say I hate ____. If I hate something or if I use the word hate, I believe I am opening myself to all forms of hate from hating beansprouts to hating dragons to hating people. If I use the extreme opposite of love to describe my feelings for something, I remove any hope of love and any hope of reconciliation.

Silly, I know. I get it. It's just a word, right? It's no big deal

Except it is for me.

Hate has a way of finding its way into our lives through our words and our actions. If I hate the smallest of creation then I have the possibility to hate the biggest of creation. If I say I hate meetings then I open myself up to say I hate you. And the moment I say I hate you I remove all hope of loving you and reconciling with you. You then become my enemy and my hate then becomes something that has no bounds.

You may think it is an extreme interpretation of the word and it is to a degree. Surely if I hate a messy room that doesn't mean I hate the person who keeps it messy? Perhaps not. Perhaps it eventually does. Perhaps the thing that you severely hate eventually becomes what you hate about the person. What if what you hate about the person becomes the reason you hate said person? It is why I cannot say "Love the sinner, hate the sin." because if I hate the sin I will eventually hate the sinner because the two are not separated. If you hate my sin then you hate me because I am the own committing the sin. Forgiveness and love cannot, in my mind, exist in the same structure as hate.

So please forgive me if I correct your tweet or status update or comment and say, "We don't say hate." It's just a part of my strict personal code and an important one for me.

A Lasting Legacy: A Charge to the Church & Deacons

I did not intend last week’s sermon to produce a sequel of sorts. I was ready to move on to the next chapter in Ephesians and already had a sermon written, ready to go but as last Sunday came I felt something tugging at me. The events and conversations that took place Sunday and through emails raised a question that kept nagging me: How are we spending our days? How am I spending my days?

I answered part of the question last week when I ended the sermon with, “what we do with our life from beginning to end matters and it must have meaning” but the question still nagged at me. Was I using my days wisely or was I being foolish? I was caught off guard by this question and I really wondered where it came from. It is not often that a scripture will catch me and hold me for so long but this one did. “Be careful how you live, not as unwise but as wise, making the most of the time, because the days are evil.”

Am I making the most of my time?

It’s fascinating how things line up sometimes. Divine intervention is a funny thing, it comes at a time you least you expect it and in a way you least expect it. I was asked a question at the Fellows orientation this past week that began to shine a light on the reason why Paul’s instructions were haunting me. The question goes like this: Imagine you are at your 85^th birthday. Everyone is there: you’re entire family, your friends, your colleagues, teachers, everyone. You’re surrounded by everyone who has ever loved you and during the celebration your son/daughter gets up and offers a toast, what would their toast be?

It’s hard for me to think that far ahead. My personality type struggles with planning or thinking about what someone would say about me at a celebration of my life. I rarely think about it, and I am sure most of you do as well, because life moves and taking a moment to see how we use our time affects our legacy is something we rarely do. I searched for answer in the back of my mind, just in case I was called on and I struggled to find something. My heart of hearts was saying, “I hope, when my son stands up he will simply say, “I am glad you are my dad.” It is not the most awe inspiring toast but it is the one I desire to hear the most.

As others answered the question, I wondered what my response would be if the question was: Imagine you’re at a banquet and you are the guest of honor. At the banquet are all the people who’ve encountered in your life, including a who’s who of important people. Jesus gets up, clicks the champagne glass and offers a toast, what would his toast be? My hope would be that he would say that I used my time wisely, making the most of it by living it in such a way that showcased his love through my actions and in my caring of those he placed in my life.

But that’s how I would answer the question. How would you answer the question? What would you hope his toast would be? What would you hope be your children’s toast? How would our church answer the question? What would his toast to Bruington Baptist Church be? What will be our children’s toast in a 100 years, 50 years, 20 years, 10 years, even 5 years?

It is one of two questions I ask each of you to think on this morning. It is one of two questions I ask our current active deacons and our newly elected deacons. It is one of two questions I ask our Trustees, our Sunday school teachers, our nursery workers, our parents, our youth, our children, our choir, our leaders: what will be our legacy?

The thing about a legacy is it’s unwritten. We are able to write out our legacy and create a story that will help define our lives and our church. For years Wyatt Earp was remembered as a criminal, an outlaw for murdering members of the McLaury’s and Clanton’s in a federal deputized raid of vengeance for the death of his brother Morgan and the maiming of Virgil. It wasn’t until later in his life when he invited a young reporter up to his hotel room and began to share his side of story that his legacy changed. We remember Wyatt Earp as a pioneer in Western Justice because he shared his story and chose to help shape his own legacy. Likewise, we have the opportunity to shape ours by choosing how we spend our days.

Before we look forward, sometimes it helps to look back and see all that we’ve done. In the past year this church has: called a new pastor, baptized three new members and welcomed two more. We have installed a brand new sound system, crossing off a goal that’s been lingering since 1994. We have made several important repairs to the church. We’ve hosted a wonderful Thanksgiving lunch. We have built ramps, made visits, and help feed our homebound members. We have celebrated weddings and we have mourned deaths. We have planted seeds and help provide an experience in which the children in our community could encounter Christ and possibly changed a life without knowing it. We have begun reconnecting with others through our softball games. We have clothed and fed countless families in our community to help them make ends meet.

Over the past year we have done a lot of wonderful things and accomplished many goals. I am proud to say that all the goals I set for the year have accomplished. We have done some amazing things and we should be proud. We should take a moment and celebrate this past year and we will do so on September 16 at the Open House at the Parsonage. We will remind ourselves of the hope this past year has brought us and we will take a moment to be thankful for that is the mark of wisdom and using our time wisely: taking a moment and being thankful for the blessings of the year.

Then, after some good food and company and cake (there should always be cake at a celebration), we will turn towards the horizon of 2013 and begin to make goals for the year that will further shape this church’s legacy and how we will spend our time. And this leads me to my second question for us this morning: What is our vision?

Our vision is a part of our legacy. It is the why that gives us reason to live a legacy that matters. It is the why that shapes our goals and forms how we spend our days. Our vision gives us ambitions to achieve our goals. Our vision fuels our programs, events, gatherings, worship, and our community services. It drives us to give everything we do our best. It gets out of bed when all we want to do is sleep. It helps us spend our days wisely because we are doing what God has called us to do.

I believe in visions. I believe in the importance of having a personal vision, a goal, an ambition as well as the church having their own. I used to struggle with as a teenager. I remember riding around in the car with my dad one day, I think I was 15 or 16 and he asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I told him I wasn't sure and so he asked, "Don't you have any ambitions?" I said, "Well, I'd like to ask out Llaura Harris but I am not sure how I do that." 

I struggled with the question as a college student as well. By the end of my first two days of classes at OBU I answered the question, “What do you plan to do with your life?” eight different ways for eight different classes. I believe I wrote the following: US Marshal, hostage negotiator, actor, writer, Superman, Batman, Olympic Runner, and if I told you I’d have to kill you (that one got me in a little trouble). When you’re 19 it is hard to have a vision or a clear vision of what you want to be when you “grow up.” But as I grew up and discovered my calling I found a purpose. I found my vision and each day I am here, I hope I have the wisdom to spend the time wisely living into that vision. That vision is this: To care for those I am gifted to minister in a congregational setting. And to minister to ministers who need a helping hand.

People come to places where they know they are prepared for and cared for. I learned that this past week and reminded me of the importance of how we spend our days. You come here expecting me to be prepared for you, to have a service and sermon ready for you. You come here expecting Sunday school teachers and nursery workers prepared and ready for you and your children and to care for you. You send your children to VBS expecting us to be prepared for them and care for them. You come to picnics, breakfasts, revivals, candlelight services, musicals, camps, outings, expecting us to be prepared for you. Each of us comes to church and church events expecting the church to be prepared for and care for us.

People will come to a place where they know they are prepared for and cared for. Will our legacy be one in which we prepared for those who are here? Will it be one in which we are known for our care? Will our vision be one that motivates us, excites us to prepare and care?

That is our challenge this morning as a church and newly elected/ordained deacons: What will our legacy be? What will our vision be? And as leaders and members of this church you are being asked to help shape it and that gives me great hope in our future together.

A Lasting Legacy: You Have Chosen Wisely

Do you recall the movie Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade?

Silly question I'm sure but not everyone is as a movie buff as I am or have time on their hands to watch a lot of movies. For those who haven't or cannot remember the premise: The movie focuses on part time archeology professor and full time awesome adventurer, Dr. Indiana Jones and his search for the holy grail, the cup of Christ used at the Last Supper. Indiana goes through several amazing adventures that eventually lead him to a hidden city and after passing three tests, he comes into a secluded cave where an old knight is sitting guarding/protecting the holy grail. The problem is Indiana has to chose the cup out of hundreds of possibilities. Once he's chosen the cup the has to take a drink from a spring and if he's chosen wisely he lives, if not he dies.

The Nazi bad guy decides he should get to choose first and his mistress chooses a golden cup with jewels. He believes the cup because of its decor is truly the cup of the King of Kings. He bravely dips the cup into the spring and toasts, “To eternal life” and takes a sip. After a few dramatic seconds (SPOILERS) he starts to literally decay in front every one. After turning to dust, the Knight says, “He chose poorly.” Indiana chooses a dusty, dirty wooden cup, a cup of a carpenter and takes a swig from the spring and surprise, surprise, the Knight tells him, “You have chosen wisely.”

Today's scripture is sort of like this scene. Paul tells the church of Ephesus to be careful then how you live, not as unwise people but as wise, making the most of the time, because the days are evil. So do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. Do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery; but be filled with the Spirit, as you sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs among yourselves, singing and making melody to the Lord in your hearts, giving thanks to God the Father at all times and for everything in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ (Ephesians 5:15-20).

Choose wisely.

Paul's instructions could be seen as instructions that say, “Live as I live and do as I do and you will live a good life.” And perhaps to us modern day Christians it comes off as such but Paul was writing to a church and to a culture that was new Christianity. The churches Paul was planting were full of more Gentiles than Jews and they were coming from a culture that might not be considered Christian. So Paul would write instructions like this because part of his mission was not only persuade people to become followers of Christ but to teach them how to live differently or in our church terms: how to act like Christians.

This type of instruction is littered throughout Ephesians. We've read the instructions for unity in the church and how members are to speak to one another by building up and lifting in love. So, while Paul's instructions may seem dated or cultural specific, we still struggle with half truths and separating the gospel from the culture, these instructions can help us navigate our way through and navigate what it means to be church.

Paul begins his instructions by telling the church to live wisely by making the most of our time because the days are evil. I am not entirely sure why Paul thinks the days are evil. Perhaps it has to do with the immediate interpretation that Christ was to return very soon thus they needed to make the most of their time. It could be Paul has the case of the Mondays. What Paul means, or what I think, is that we need to make the most of our time because time is a valuable commodity. We struggle to make the most out of our days and get that proverbial to do list done.

Paul isn't speaking to husbands who ignore the honey-do-list but speaking more to the church. How the church spends its time matters. If the church spends a majority of its time in meetings or visioning or repairing or arguing or in class, then it could be argued that the church is not using its time wisely. If the ministers, the deacons and members are not out and about doing the work of Christ then we are wasting time. We have a job to do and we shouldn't be wasting our time with frivolous matters.

Of course we know the importance of meetings, visioning, repairs, and Sunday school classes or small groups but if a church is doing just that then the church is not using its time wisely. If the church's ministers are spending their days cooped up in their offices or writing ideas on whiteboards or planning events, it could be argued they are wasting their days. Again, those things are important but there's more that needs to be done and we do not have a lot time to get it all done.

I am not a very good time manager. If you were to grade my time management skills I would probably get a C or C+. I suffer from the disease procrastinitus which causes me to procrastinate and I will put off my papers, my sermons, bulletin work, until the last minute because I prefer to do other things. Sometimes though I put off making visits because I'm not in the mood or I've gotten wrapped in a conversation online. I am just not a very good time manager. Unless we're traveling; when it comes to travel I am very pushy about how we use our time.

This type of wisdom though, the issue of time, probably received its influence not only through the understanding of Jesus' immediate return but through the parables of being awake and being prepared. Overall though, the issue of time management is important for the church. If a church is spending it's time feeding members only then the hungry are forgotten. If the hungry are the only ones being feed then the members become hungry. I truly believe a wise church is a church that discovers how to balance the importance of feeding both the hungry and the members.

Paul urges us to make the most of our time. Paul knows that time flies and that's why he is instructing the church to make the most out of their time, for at the last day all of us must give an account of the way we used it.

That reminds of the old Harry Chapin song “Cat's In the Cradle”. You remember that song, right? Cat's in the cradle with silver spoon, little boy blue and the man in the moon. When you coming home dad? I don't know when but we'll get together then son. We'll have a good time then.

I may be accused of many things in my life but being a workaholic I will never be. In fact, some may mistake me as being lazy. Making the most of my time matters, making the most of our time matters, and Paul's instructions may be directed to the church but how we spend our time as Christians matters too. If we must give an account of the we way used this precious gift of time, then my hope is that we will be able to say, “I spent my time tending to all you placed in my care. I spent time gardening with a neighbor, riding with a friend, playing catch with my son or daughter, sitting on the porch swing with my wife. I spent my time feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, caring for the poor, visiting the sick, and those in prison and I have done it in the most unique and creative ways.”

I think Jesus would like that answer. I think Paul would too, if he's eavesdropping.

So we are to choose wisely with our time and not to act foolish but understand the Lord's will and to be filled with the Spirit. Being filled with the Spirit and understanding the Lord's will means we will learn how to balance our time and use it wisely. For we are only here for a little while and what we do with our life from beginning to end matters and it must have meaning. 

There's more to explore but we'll save that for the sequel next week. 

Ministers as Spiritual Guides: Changing Behavior

Over the past few weeks I have been doing some very personal and deep reflection on the way I treat others. I am not sure what prompted this reflection. I think it's because Connor is now repeating things he hears very well now and starting to understand better. Thus I have been on this inward spiritual reflection.

I think how a minister or Christian treats another human being says a lot about their faith. If the words and actions that come out of my mouth do not reflect that which I deeply believe then the reflection tells a completely different story.

I, like many, was bullied in middle school by an older neighbor. We eventually moved and I went into high school, started lifting weights, lost my braces, got contacts and started to learn a little bit about how to dress better. Eventually I became the bully.

There was a student in my freshman algebra class named Brian Adams. Now the poor kid already had a lot working against him: socially awkward, wore glasses, eventually wore a long black trench coat, liked weird Japanese anime books. So to have the same name as a Canadian rock star who's recent hit was all the rage with the ladies, was just not fair for the guy.

I would pick on Brian during class about certain things and one day he looked me square in the eye and said, "I think you pick on me because you're unhappy with yourself." It was a well timed and appropriate response to my bullying. Later in the year I would apologize and while we were never really friends, I have come to be thankful for that moment and his words.

A few years passed and a friend came into class to tell us they shooting up the school. We were confused and thought someone was shooting up our school. Turns out as our teacher turned the TV on she was referring to the Columbine shootings. As details emerged from that horrific incident, our school started profiling students who they thought showed similar tendencies as Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold. Mainly anyone who wear a trench-coat was profiled and watched.

A month or so later, one of the students belonging to the group was suspected of making a death threat and his locker was searched. I was told, or the rumors that floated down the halls told me, that a book was found in the locker containing names on what was called a hit list and at number five was my name.

At first I tried to play it off and joked about not being number one. But the hard truth is, it hit me really hard. Had I been that mean to people? Was I treating someone poorly? I knew I wasn't the greatest at being kind but I didn't think I had done anything too drastic to someone. But there was my name at number 5.

Of course, looking back, it's all speculative and probably just rumors but that incident in May of 1999 when I was 18 put me on a path of reflection and conversation that has led me to this point at 31. A reflection on the importance of being kind to others.

I have a tendency to get caught up in moments and call others names or put people down. It's not hard to do so when a majority of your classmates did the same or those you are in constant contact with do. As I reflected on the text for the past two Sundays, I remembered that incident and I started to remember how poorly I may have treated others over time. I realized that I no longer wanted to be a part of that system.

I am seeking forgiveness and I am changing. (cue the song we're all humming)

I no longer wanted to be a part of a system that prides itself on tearing others down in order to build up  the self. I looked at the towel with my name on it and was powerfully reminded that I am a servant. A servant who is to lift up in love and build up. My behavior towards others, specifically towards others who were very different than me, needed to change.

So I'm working on it. It will take some time and patience. It will be hard but the system needs to change and I'm tired of functioning in a false narrative. I want to live in a way that lifts others in love and in grace.

Perhaps then the behavior my son ends up mimicking the most will be one of building up and not tearing down.

Oh my dear son, how you are changing this father's life for the better.

Lifting In Love: It is Easier to Tear Down Than to Build Up

Let no evil talk come out of your mouths, but only what is useful for building up, as there is need, so that your words may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with which you were marked with a seal for the day of redemption. Put away from you all bitterness and wrath and anger and wrangling and slander, together with all malice, and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you. Therefore be imitators of God as beloved children, and live in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

It's easier to tear something down than it is to build up. Building something or some one up takes time, energy, and patience. Tearing down only takes a good swing or one perfectly timed word. We struggle building one another up and sometimes we are too eager to tear someone down. Most of our wars, our arguments and fights were started because we chose to tear down instead of build up. It is easier to tear someone down than it is to build them up.

If I could make an observation about society as a whole I would say we live in an angry time, at least that is what I think: anger over the economy, lost jobs, struggles, life, schools, society, ourselves, religion, and politics. The angrier people get the meaner they become. Civility is no longer really a part of our society especially when it comes to politics, religion, and sports. It is easier, in our anger, to tear people down. It is easier in our anger to put people in their place forcefully. It is easier in our anger to let loose and let our enemies have it. We live with the mentality that you're either with “them” or your with “us” and if you're not with “us” then you are against “us.” We make those who think differently our enemies and at every corner we're looking for a chance to tear them a part.

Christians however have been called to be set apart. Our actions, our words are to be words and actions that build up and not tear down. We are called to imitate Christ in our actions and our words. It is hard for someone to see Jesus as the way when those who call themselves Christians rarely, if ever, truly imitate Christ. It is as hard to imitate Christ as it is hard to build up. We tend to look at Christ and think, “Well, he's God's son and I'm not so...” We sort of use God's grace as an excuse to act in a way that tears others down instead of build them up. We want God's grace but sometimes we're not willing to extend to it to others.

My missions professor in seminary, Dr. Caleb Oladipo, would respond to every student who answered a question, “Very good! That is a good answer.” and he would do this whether he agreed or disagreed. If he disagreed he would present a different argument but he never put them down or belittled them. His intent was always to build them up. He values the students in his class and values the people he comes into contact with. During our trip to Buenos Aries, Caleb became engaged in a serious conversation with one of the students about race issues in America. The student believed that if African Americans were to continue to marry others of a different race the African American culture would be lost. “If you put enough cream in coffee, it eventually stops being coffee,” she argued. Caleb, being an African native responded, “I disagree. It doesn't matter how much cream you put into coffee, it always be coffee. The sun will never set on the sons and daughters of Africa.” The conversation continued and the student became very heated but Caleb never once sought to put her in her place but showed us all how to treat others during a heated debate.

I marvel at the way Caleb accepted ever student who was in his class. He is grateful for their presence and grateful to have them. He always sought to build his students up and not tear them down and it's not often that a person with such prestige lifts their students up. He is just one example of what it means to build up in love. Just one example of what it means to be kind to another and tenderhearted. He is just one example of what it means to an imitator of Christ.

I have stated several times in the past few weeks that there needs to be room at our table for all of God's children, not just the ones we like or the ones who are in our circle. I believe this to be true. I believe in my heart of hearts that if Christians wish to change the world and honor God then we need to set a place at our table for those we may consider the “least of these.” If we can't, if we don't, if we're unwilling, then we forget the grace which has been given to us through Christ and the gospel we proclaim to be true loses its truth.

Let no evil talk come out of your mouths, but only what is useful for building up, as there is need, so that your words may give grace to those who hear (4:29). Put away from you all bitterness and wrath and anger and wrangling and slander, together with all malice, and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you. Therefore be imitators of God (4:31-5:2a).

Some may believe it is impossible to live by these words or that Paul means them to only be for how the Christian community deals with one another. To me that would be like saying the things Jesus said and preached were only for how his disciples were to treat each other. They are words that we are to live by not just in our churches but in the real world. We've been told a lie, a lie that says those who disagree with you, those who vote differently than you, those who are not just like you are the enemy. They are not. They are our neighbors. They are God's children as we are God's children.

Last week's Curtis comic strip comes to my mind.

For those not familiar with the comic strip: Curtis is an eleven year old African American boy from a blue collar family. He has a younger brother and the two do not see eye to eye, like a lot of siblings. His father works hard but they are barely able to make ends meet. Curtis has a crush on a rich girl and one of the local girls has a big crush on him. Anyway, in last week's Sunday strip, Curtis and his family were out at the park enjoying a picnic. Several homeless men gathered by the fence and Curtis' dad walks over with a plate of hamburgers for each of them. Curtis asks his dad, “What'd you do that for? Why'd you give 'em our burgers?” “People are people, Curtis.” he said.

People are people whether they believe in our Christ, worship in our church, members of our denomination or another, or whether they belong to another or belong to none. People are people and every person should be treated as we would want to be treated. I think Jesus came up with that. I think that's called the golden rule but Paul's instructions to the church go beyond just being polite, as Jesus goes beyond just being nice. No, these instructions are instructions that imitate Christ. They are instructions for us to become full imitators of Christ. And if we are imitators of Christ then our love must have no limits, our tables must have an open seat for the stranger, the outcast in whatever form they come in.

I am working on starting something new. Tell me what you think.

You have heard it said, “Love the sinner; hate the sin” but I say to you, “Love the sinner; forgive the sinner as you are loved and forgiven by Christ. For we are all sinners and we are all in need of a little tenderheartedness and a little grace and a little forgiveness.”

I think Paul's on to something here. Be kind to another or in the words of Abraham Lincoln in his speech to San Dimas High School in Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, “Be excellent to one another.” Words to live by in a world filled with madness. Words to guide us in a world that tells a false story. Words to remember when we tell our story, the story that differs from the world's, the story of Christ and his great love and forgiveness for us all.    

Lifting Up in Love Without Labels

Our scripture passage this morning can be found here

I was thinking about the labels we have for one another. We are all generalized and compartmentalized based on our gender, skin color, theology, church affiliation, political affiliation, how much we make, where we live, who we hang out with, what type of music we listen too, the clothes we wear, and so many more different ways. We're divided into groups based on those things and given a label. We're either democrat, republican, independent, liberal, conservative, fundamentalist, geek, nerd, jock, hipster, redneck, country, poor, wealthy, outsiders, or insiders. And those are just a few of labels we are given and give to others.

I often use labels when I preach. I generalize a group of people into a label and speak about them in some way. Often it's to try to make a point and get us to see that the other is not our enemy and sometimes that point fails. This week, as I read Ephesians 4, I started to wonder what if we rid ourselves of those labels? What if we were truly neither republican or democrat or independent but followers of Christ? What if we were one body and one spirit in Christ?

Ephesians 4 is a pastor's dream passage, I think. It's one of the few Pauline quotes that is able to truly transcend time and context. If a church is struggling and in disarray the pastor is able to pull up Ephesians 4 and urge that his/her congregation remember they are united through Christ. The thought of being united in Christ is ironic in thought. Christ said that he had come not to bring peace but a sword. That he would divide sons from the fathers, daughters from their mothers, son in laws from their father in laws, and daughter in-laws from their mother in-laws. Our enemies would come from our own household. And the truth of Christ is that he does divide. The reality of who Christ is and what Christ commands us are things that would divide a house.

But that doesn't mean we cannot come together. We may be divided on issues and the public sees this division and believes that if Christians are unable to be in unison then what truth does their gospel hold. The reality of being a follower of Christ is that we are in constant conflict: conflict with how the world is and how the world should be; conflict with one another over the meaning of Christ's commands; conflict in reconciling what the prophets, Christ, and Paul say concerning the poor, the government, same-sex relations, greed, the oppressed, theories of atonement, wealth, war, etc. We are in constant conflict and that's okay. Conflict is not bad. It is one's reaction to conflict that matters.

Life is full of conflict. Good stories involve some form of conflict and we've been working towards a faith that believes we are supposed to live without conflict. Conflict is a part of life, a necessary part. Without conflict we tell boring safe stories that are not true. A church that says they do not experience conflict is a church that is telling a safe story. They are not living in the fullness of God. Living in the fullness of God means there is going to be conflict. There is conflict because each of us is different. Each of us has been given a different gift by God and if these gifts are gifts from God then diversity is gift as well. The list of gifts Paul gives is different from the ones in Romans and 1 Corinthians. The gifts he lists seem most likely to be a list found in church leadership. The gifts of the laity are listed in the other letters.

Cecil Sherman once said, “Of the four mentioned, at least two are rarely used in the Baptist church.”¹ He said he didn't know of a Baptist church with an apostle. Once though there was a Baptist association in Virginia that made Samuel Harris an apostle. He kept the job for a couple of years before resigning saying that no person should have such authority over a Baptist congregation. “We do have prophets,” Dr. Sherman said, “Though many are not preachers.”² The politics of being a pastor requires having a majority and prophets don't fit the role of pastor. Occasionally someone will be prophetic. They will speak for God but we do not recognize them until afterward. Then, looking back, we see them for that they were: a prophet.

We have evangelists and have pastors and teachers. Cecil observed those who have evangelists don't need them and those who don't do. Pastors and teachers are common and those offices are filled to the highest standard.

Four different gifts listed, each important and each different. Each position, each gift means we will have different personality traits but why does God create us so differently? To equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, until all of us come to the unity of the faith. It takes all personality types to accomplish this goal. Being different is a gift from God and something we should celebrate not hinder or impede. We've been created differently and given different gifts because we cannot come to the unity of faith if we are all the same.

You and I need one another if are to continue telling this story God is writing. We need our diversity and our differences because if a church is full of people who are all the same then conflict remains hidden and we have not found the fullness of God. It is in our diversity, our differences we start to see the fullness of God's kingdom at work. Jesus chose twelve disciples all different from one another and often in conflict with one another. But they were chosen to help build up the church and equip the saints until all came to the unity of the faith. You and I are a part of that story and we must tolerate, no, love one another with the love of Christ if this story is going to continue to be told through the church.

You and I are as different as different can be: each one of us with our different viewpoints, politics, interpretations, theology, social standing, hair color, height, and our gifts. Yet, we have been asked to walk together and tell this never ending story God is writing for the world. If we cannot. If we cannot learn to fully love one another for our differences then we will struggle to appreciate each other. If we cannot stay in the room and have serious conversations about the tough issues, then we tell the world our gospel isn't true.

Unity is not found in majority votes or agreements but in working to achieve a common goal and that goal is to fulfill the commandments Christ has given us; and we will fulfill them together; and we will overcome the conflict together. Because if I have the story right, it's going to take all of us to do church.³ We can do it if we lift one another up without labels.

1Sherman, Cecil. “A Church and Its Diversity: Ephesians 4:1-16”, Formations Commentary: Romans-Revelation. Smyth and Helwys Publishing Inc.: Georgia, 2006 (95-96).

2Sherman, 96.

3Sherman, 97